A Room With a View

A Room with A View

It was not a beautiful room
Functional, clean and acceptable
There was a bathroom, a big bathroom
Bidet, shower and good, hot water

The bed was large, not king-size
But big enough for 2
And sometimes three
It was often used

There was a room before the bedroom
It was usually bare, like me
Except for a table and 2 chairs
It led to the bedroom

There was a balcony, seldom used
That looked out onto a big garden
It was a pretty view
But nobody really wanted to look

By the side of the bed
Was a music centre
It played to drown out my noises
I am often loud when fucked

The music was often English
And frequently the same
It was background music
And only a few visitors were interested

And by the bed, a bedside cabinet
Where I kept my condoms and toys
And sometimes massage oil
If it was needed

It seldom was as my visitor
Wanted to be in
With his tongue, cock and finger
And I was happy to oblige

There was a chair
Where playmates heaped their clothes
Some folded them neatly
Others too much in a rush to bother

From the bed I could look in the bathroom
It was green and spacious
Some action took place here
But more often than not it was just for washing

It was a quiet, secluded room
Peaceful and ordinary
Looking at it now
You would never believe the things
That took place inside

But there are some of us who do!!!! ;-)

Taking the Piss!

A few years ago I used to meet up with a film director. Not a big time director, but he appeared to be good. He was a gentleman, handsome and great body. He was also into drinking urine. My urine!

He used to bring a large plastic cover which he would place over the bed. I would then sit on his face and let flow a large amount of the golden rain. It was always a large amount as he would give me a lot of notice about his visit and he would ask me to drink a lot.

What always surprised me was that I never drowned him. Women have less control of their wee than men and when I wee it just goes. And he would gurgle and gargle away. He loved it. It is not my cup of tea but he swore that it was doing him good. He always seemed healthy and he visited me off and on for some time.

Nonetheless, I have never taken to drinking urine myself. However, I am happy to offer mine as a drink etc when requested.

Urine is seen as a miracle elixir if you look on certain websites. Just google 'benefits of drinking urine' and you will get the idea. Famous people now and throughout history have taken to the brew.

Just near me in Ostia Antica there is an archaeological site. Ostia was the port for Rome during the Empire days. Well if you walk around the site you will find one or two shops that used to keep urine.

A man would visit houses to collect the stuff. Urine is a disinfectant, a cleaner and is also used in dyes. The places that did this were known as fulleries (fullonicae). You will see these at Pompeii too! Maybe I am a modern day fullery!!!! The only dyeing is the 'petite mort'.

So I am happy for you to take the piss out of me, as the English would say!

dariax@hotmail.co.uk

0039 3281769818

A new way to improve your English!

I am amazed how many second language speakers read this blog. The feedback from many is that as they are interested in the topics discussed so they take more interest in learning. And this is true.

 I remember my English lessons and some were really boring and often the text book too. So do you think I should write a text book 'English and Sex'? It would be fun.

 I would love to write a section on 'Fucking' and introducing the present continuous!

One area of the English language I am currently interested in is slang and taboo language and how this differs quite considerably in the English speaking world. Take the word 'PISS' for example.

If I said to a sex worker, 'T am taking the PISS out of you.', they would be thinking that someone wanted to drink their urine. Now this is a common request and I do reccommend the 'Daria Cocktail'!!! However, if a British person said this they would be ridiculing or mocking you. So a very different meaning.

In the UK and other English speaking Commonwealth countries you often hear the expression, 'Stop taking the piss!'. Another common expression meaning the same without the urine bit is 'Stop taking the Mick'. Both mean the same and want you to stop making jokes at the person's expense.It does not mean stop drinking my urine!

Now another common area of confusion for Americans and Brits is the expression, 'I'm pissed!'. For a UK person this will mean that they are drunk, intoxicated, Which they often are. This is not a criticism for any British reader, just an observation. For an American this will mean that they are angry. Again there is a big difference although I suppose it is easy to be drunk and angry! Now if a Brit does want to say he is angry and to use the word PISS, he will say 'I am pissed off'. You often hear the expression, 'You piss me off', which mean you make me angry.

And finally PISS OFF. No, I don't mean you the reader, I mean the expression, 'PISS OFF'. This has the same meaning as 'FUCK OFF' which means go away.

Now I will FUCK OFF as I have things to do. If anyone wants an English lesson with a difference, An English lesson with a lot of tongue twisters!!!! Then get in touch.

By the way I am a very strict teacher!

dariax@hotmail.co.uk

0039 3281769818